The Girls of Pattaya Part I

The Girls of Pattaya Part I

We recently had a highly controversial anonymous submission detailing a lifestyle we at Global Hobo don’t necessarily see eye-to-eye on. The reason for this controversy is that the author is essentially a sex tourist. In his own words, “I understand how misogynistic and depraved the concept of sex tourism is, [but] do my best to express the truth, the moral dilemmas and the culture clash that I faced.” We decided to run it. This is part I.

***

As the morning kicked on, and the venues of debauchery remained closed, my cousin and I exchanged anecdotes from the previous night. My experience had neither been unsuccessful nor fulfilling. He, on the other hand, had accepted the party was over when his time was more consistently spent in the Gogo’s toilets than with his travelling circus of women.

Yep. He had diarrhea.

All the precautions in the world can’t keep the bugs out of your stomach in a place like Thailand. Rain. Forgetting to use bottled water to brush your teeth. Washed fruit and vegetables. You’ve spent your whole life viewing water as your friend, but over here, unrefined H2O is the most important thing on your list of “shit to avoid consuming”. Bottled water becomes your lifeblood, and at seven baht a bottle, you’d be an idiot for not stockpiling the moment you get to your hotel.

Feeling far better after popping Imodium tablets, and already on the turps again, my cousin gave his watch a glance and nodded.

“I think you’re ready now.”
“…Ready for what exactly?”
“The Six.”

The serious tone on his face showed me he wasn’t taking this lightly. Whatever we were about to do was something intense, demanding and requiring a lot of focus.

So what in the hell was The Six? We left the hotel and jumped on the back of a couple of motorcycle taxis. As we breezed in and out of traffic along Second Road, the tourist bars and stores began fading and were replaced by large chain hotels. The pedestrians changed from drunken single men clutching the hands of petite Thai women to Caucasian parents holding the hands of their oblivious children.

We passed through a larger intersection and our surroundings became momentarily nondescript before we pulled off the road and disembarked our transport. Handing over 50 baht each, I followed my cousin towards the entrance of a soi cornered by two bars and caught a glimpse of the numbered street we were about to enter.

Soi 6.

Turning into the road and coming face to face with what lurked ahead, I made it undeniably clear to everyone that this was my first time here.
“HOLY FUCK.”

Ask anyone who’s been there, and they will express the same sentiment. There is no place in the world like Soi 6. If you put every red light district on Earth within one solid complex, it couldn’t match the absolute deviancy of this small stretch of road in Pattaya. If I had at any moment prior questioned how people could view Pattaya as a sex tourist town, then Soi 6 silenced me eternally.

The very instant you enter the soi, you accept that anything goes here. Yelling, whistling, caressing, groping, accosting, leering, chasing, tackling, hugging, grabbing, holding. You are not a human being anymore. You are a piece of meat….. with money.

Tiny bars fill every nook and cranny of the street, and outside each one, Thai girls position themselves for the attack. Some may holler. Some may reach out and grab your arm as you pass by. Others may decide you’re not going past and block your path entirely. The madness of it all is exasperating. If I felt like a celebrity at the first bar in Bangkok, then on Soi 6 I was a Beatle walking through 1960s Liverpool. And every man that enters this street gets the same treatment.

men in soi 6

Following numerous instances of removing clutching hands and advising exuberant path blockers I wasn’t interested, we made it to the bar my cousin had his sights on. Lisa Bar is one of the more popular bars contained within the Soi, and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to understand why. Each day, Lisa’s girls dress up in different outfits that have been styled to look as appealing as a male fantasy can imagine. School girl uniforms. Traditional Chinese dresses. Geisha mock ups. If an outfit had a reputation as sexy, they wore it. Lisa also has a rule that her girls will be fined 100 baht if they are caught playing with their phones during working hours. This might seem a bit excessive to those of us who enjoy giving Facebook a sneaky peek at any moment of the day, but it is a genius move that leads to an atmosphere of constant inclusion and engagement.

As I took a seat and prepared to enjoy my cold beer in the early afternoon sun, I began to properly enjoy my environment. It was far easier to now that I wasn’t getting yelled at from every possible angle. From my position, I had a clear view of five other bars, but the venue directly beside Lisa’s was attracting the majority of attention. It also confirmed the street didn’t require any speculation about the proclivities on offer here. One girl stood out the front holding a sign with black texta announcing “Fuck me Today. Pay Tomorrow”. Another one held a large piece of cardboard declaring “FUCK ME IN MY ASS”.

I’m sure someone will oblige your request soon enough, dear.

Across the road was a joint named Spider Girl Bar. The girls here had funky costumes on, though not as grandiose as Lisa’s, and looked to be partying up a storm. It didn’t take long before I spotted a girl in all white wearing knee high stockings, a mini skirt and school shirt that stood out as the most gorgeous thing I’d witnessed on The Six so far. She would have been pushing 20, had long dark hair with curls bursting at the ends and wore an incessant smile that shaded a pair of glistening eyes and a cute button nose. The young woman was doing everything in her power to try and keep the attention of a young shirtless drunk who seemed far more interested in partying with a friend than the glamour beside him.

As he danced in the bar like a maniac and sculled the countless beers handed to him, I laughed, as the girl who in any western country would have had men queuing up to speak with her chased the loutish drunk around the bar. My cousin decided to pop on over to my table and guessed what I was looking at.

“He should put on a shirt.”
“Ahhh, he’s only having a bit of fun though cuz.”
“Answer this then. Have you seen a Thai walking round without a shirt on since arriving here?”
“Is that a trick question?”
“I mean a bloke, smart ass!”

I did a quick memory check of any moment I had witnessed a topless Thai man. Nope. Nothing.

“That’s because Thais don’t go shirtless here. It’s considered rude.”
“This may surprise you, cuz, but I’m paying far more attention to the women over here than the men.” He took another glance and now noticed the beautiful lady trying to garner the lad’s attention.
“Yeah… Too bad mate. She’s spoken for.” As my cousin turned back to continue talking with Lisa, he threw away another comment.
“If you’re that hung up on her, you could wait till he’s done.”

My cousin’s eye for circumstances made me realise something that as of yet hadn’t even crossed my mind. My natural instinct when seeing a girl I liked give affection to another man had always been Taken. Scratch it off…. in a relationship. Over here, one of these “relationships” could last as little as 20 minutes.

girl

***

When you look up on Soi 6, you’ll discover where most of the money is made here. Each bar has roughly three to five rooms on the upper levels, specifically provided for the short-time pleasuring of as many customers the girls can garner each day. While on the ground level, there is a flood of alcohol being served, only four metres above, there’s a tsunami of sperm being discarded in the toilets concealed in durex.

Some popular girls here will go through 10 to 15 customers a day. Others may fight for one or two a week. Due to the choice, pricing and minimal time spent with a customer, if you don’t have a problem with it, it is simply a matter of biding your time if a girl you like is currently occupied.

This is what my cousin was alluding to. To me, it was a fantasy killer.

This excerpt is part of a soon-to-be-published book. Check it out here.